porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize