We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize