my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
