We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
