Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
