the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
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