Midget sex pt 2 tonight
We left an ass print on the piano.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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