How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
