I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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