Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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