Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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