I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
