how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
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