I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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