Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
