I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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