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i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
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