Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.

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(315): View more from New York

Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis

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(604): View more from British Columbia

it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(916): View more from California

Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.

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(630): View more from Illinois

All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun

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(219): View more from Indiana

I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life

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(706): View more from Georgia

I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.

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