I showed him my bush... on skype.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize
