Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
