Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
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