I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Randomize