You smell like a Billy Joel song
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
