I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
