I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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