well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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