If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Success! We fucked roommates!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
