I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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