They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize