Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
