bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
