You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
