In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
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