He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize