i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
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