I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
PANTIES FOUND
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