If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize