Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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