but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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