We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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