If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
