people are starting to question the shark bite story
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
