It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
