He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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