Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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