Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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