I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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