how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
it hurts more in the daytime
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Green mimosas i think yes
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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