She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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