he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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