she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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