With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
